Green Oranges

For the past three days, I have been working on a national polio vaccination campaign for children under the age of 5. This annual campaign is conducted yearly by the Togo Ministry of Health and the World Health Organization, the latter being one of my primary work partners here in Togo. Polio has been all but eradicated in most of the world with the exception of a few "endemic" regions, Sub-Saharan West Africa being one of the largest of these regions. My job with the campaign is critical in that I not only stand around and look important, I ALSO help administer the vaccine by marking each child's thumb with an indelible ink that doesn't come off (trust me, I've had a peace sign on my left forearm for the past 72 hours.) All jokes aside, the work we've done is rather important data collection that will measure the efficacy of the campaign and what areas can be improved. The World Health Organization, also known as the WHO, trained around 100 Togolese university students and a handful of Peace Corps volunteers to go out into all the small villages across the country to gather information about the vaccination campaign. The two students that I get to work with are really nice and fun to hang out with. After we got to know each other better it was really fun to just hang out and converse with a fellow educated individual.

 

During the campaign, I made a list of interesting occurrences and observations that I will share with all of you in a bulleted format for your (and my) convenience:

 

• I live in a fairly large "prefecture," I guess you can kind of think of it as a county in the states, but a large portion of our time is spent traveling through the country from village to village. I had already seen a lot of the land surrounding my city but beyond that I really knew little about what was beyond the city limits. Turns out that there is part of what used to be the "Fazao National Park" located directly northwest of the prefecture According to Peace Corps legend, the Fazao park used to be where all the tourists went on safari during Togo's heyday in the 1980s, but since the early 2000s it has been closed off, and completely deserted. I was actually looking through a PC scrapbook the other day and saw pictures of volunteers swimming at the Fazao Hotel's pool in the 90s. In contrast to the extreme poverty that I witness on a daily basis, it was surprising to see that such a modern amenity even existed. (PS, another cool fact, apparently the park's resort is now deserted an haunted…anybody up for an adventure?!)
• For many of the people in the village far from the national road and deep in the bush, my arrival in the village marked the first time any of them had ever seen a foreigner. I'm used to being the focus of attention for many people when I walk around town, but this was an entirely different experience. I'm not sure what people tell their children, but from the way that some of them reacted to me I can only imagine that parents tell their children that white people are ghosts or even Africans with no soul (the latter of which was confirmed by a Togolese friend of mine.) Part of the vaccination process requires that we mark each child's finger with ink so that they're not vaccinated more than once – this proved to be difficult when the mere sight of me caused some of the younger children to freak out. People's reactions to white people vary greatly however, most people just yell out yovo or anasara, which means "white person." But others actually greet me in local language.
• Speaking of local language, you should know that there are about 40 different local languages and dialects. French is the "official" language, but most people who never received formal education (which is a large majority of the population) only speak their local language. During the campaign, our primary job was to visit a random sampling of households in every village/city in the prefecture (county) and discuss various aspects of the vaccination campaign that was being conducted concurrently. Both the university students I was working with spoke a few of Togos' local languages, so whenever I could conduct the survey I would, but most of the time I was accompanied with one of them who could actually communicate. I did however, get a lot of practice with my local language skills. The spoken language in my region is called Kotokoli, which is also the name of the predominate ethnic group in my region. I had a few language lessons during training, but the majority of my Kotokoli was learned "on the job." During my first 3 months at post, part of my daily routine was walking all up and down my street greeting everyone I could in the local language. It's actually a very complex give and take that can last for up to 2-3 minutes, and it's incredible to see the full thing because at first glance it is just a series of meaningless grunts, but in reality each sound is different and can mean a different affirmation.
• Having the chance to see the entire prefecture for the first time was one of my favorite thing about the campaign. Sokodé is located at the base of a large mountain range and so for the first time in my life I am surrounded by something other than sprawling plains. Sometimes I just like to sit on my porch and stare at the mountains. Visiting other volunteers' villages during the campaign was also cool because I got to see how volunteers in really small villages live. Right now it's the dry season, which means that the air is super arid and dusty, but I actually prefer it because it gets cool at night.
• One of the most interesting things that happened was on the afternoon of the second day, my partner and I were out in a very remote village where there was no street food to be found. We basically ended up sitting at a random person's house after the survey and they made lunch for us. When I asked my partner if he knew who the family was, he said "No, but here in Africa we believe that if there is enough food for one, there is enough food for two." The sentiment of fraternity and community here in Togo is special many ways, and I am continually amazed by how people with so little are willing to give so much. In case you were curious as to what we ate for lunch, it was boiled rice formed into sticky balls called pâte that we ate with a palm oil sauce with a meat that I'm pretty sure was goat tongue. To be perfectly honest, it was my first experience eating tongue and it didn't taste half bad. At least…I hope it was tongue. :/ You can never really be to sure in this country what animal contributed to your meal.

 

These last few days I have been spending time in Lomé, the capital of Togo. It is the only major country capital in the world that is located adjacent to the border of another country, Ghana. I think this has to do with the way in which the west African countries were split up after their independence was granted from European colonials. Anyways, being in Lomé means lots of yummy food, ice cream, spending time on private beaches, and hanging out with other volunteers in the comfort of air conditioning. There is also wifi internet in the PC office, which makes downloading large files and uploading pictures much less stressful. Today I am going to be playing in a soccer match for International Volunteers Day at the University in Lomé. There are a few other European volunteer organizations as well as international development organizations that partner with various West African NGOs. Yesterday was the swearing in ceremony of the 2011-2013 Girls Education and Environmental Action volunteer groups. Two groups swear in every year, one in August (my group) and one in November. It was a surreal experience to be sitting in the audience watching a group experience something that I only experience a few months ago – yet it felt like just yesterday I was standing up in front of government dignitaries and host families giving a speech in a language that I just learned during the previous two weeks. This experience, while hard, is one of the most satisfying experiences of my life in ways that I did and did not expect. I would agree to do it again in a heartbeat.

 

Love love.

 

P.S. – I should probably explain the reason this post is titled "Green Oranges." Oranges in Togo are one of the biggest sources of produce and they are ridiculously cheap (5 for 25 cents USD). The most interesting thing about them though is that they are not orange as we would think, they are a deep green. I remember being a bit off put by that in the beginning of my service, but now I eat a few a day and they are easily one of the most delicious things in this country. During the campaign, I had oranges for lunch twice.

Double Rainbow.

It's rainy season right now in Togo, which means that almost every
day, like clockwork, the ominous gray clouds come rolling in from the
south to release copious amounts of precipitation. On most days, I
hang out with my cat and nap at home, staring at the mountains from my
back porch. Most of my time is spent reading or watching episodes of
Glee or hanging out with volunteers as they pass through my town, but
on the days that it rains, everything slows down to a crawl. This
change of pace can even be sensed among the hurried grande marché,
which is usually bustling with activity in the towns' center. A few
days ago, as the rain was beginning to subside in the late afternoon,
I decided to take a walk. The sun was beginning to set so the sky was
a rich golden hue that can only be described as warm honey, and
everything smelled clean (which is a rarity for this country, trust
me.) As I started walking down my road, I glanced over my shoulder and
saw one of the most magnificent sights I've witnessed since coming to
this country – a full double rainbow. I physically laughed out loud at
the sight, and ran back inside my house to get my camera. It's on days
like these, as cliché as it sounds, that I really felt connected to
this place. I have only seen a double rainbow once before, and it was
in a park in Plano by the house I grew up in. I still remember trying
to get my mom to come with me to try and find the pot of gold at the
end of it (give me a break, I was a young and impressionable 7 year
old.) A lot of things about this experience in Togo have been
difficult and trying, but it's nice to feel that there is still, and
always will be, beauty everywhere you look.

According to many volunteers, the month of September is one of the
slowest months at post. It's right before school starts and being
during the rainy seasons means that many people are out working the
fields, planting and harvesting crops for the coming months of
Harmatan, the "dry" season. Aside from my usual daily activities of
reading, studying, watching movies, and cooking, I have been slowly
building a contact list of possible work partners in my city. Being in
a large, centrally located city, the majority of my work will be
operational and technical related tasks with NGOs, but I am also
hoping to spend time working in a few of the local hospitals. My Peace
Corps assignment is Community Health, so I also plan on riding my bike
to some of the smaller surrounding villages to do presentations on
different health topics and to also help with baby weighing.
Sometimes, just being here feels like work, but I'm learning more and
more everyday and while I still feel like a stranger every time I walk
outside, I feel like I'm slowly beginning to integrate into my
immediate community. As they say, slow and steady wins the race. That
has become my new mantra.

Still in good health and spirits, but I miss everyone at home very
much. Thank you for your continued love and support! I'm hoping to try
and upload some pictures that I've taken before the end of the month.

Love love.

Progress Reports.

I've been told that we're approaching the "three month" mark of life in Togo, and I must say, sometimes it feels like a lot more, but most of the time, it feels like a lot less time has gone by. Getting through training and moving to post was stressful and fun and exciting and so many other random emotions that you weren't even sure you had the capability to express in a 24 hour period. All in all, one of the most rewarding things has simply been learning how to accept life's little success. For example, I now keep daily track of my health including mental/emotional status, vital signs, and number of bowel movements. That's right, having 1-2 healthy (key word being healthy) bowel movements a day is considered an accomplishment, at least it is in my opinion.

A large part of my time these first few weeks at post has been spent wandering around my city trying to figure out where everything is. Along with this come the trials and tribulations of learning about any new city. Most people are very nice and the ritual of greeting someone in local language can sometimes be a give and take that lasts a good minute.  So far, I've found two ladies in the market from which I buy fruits and vegetables. I've found a nice fish lady (for the cat, I haven't quite yet developed the stomach for smoked fish), and today I even had coffee ice cream. Other volunteers have mentioned a bakery of sorts and the "jean guy" carries the most random assortment of jeans this side of the Atlantic, but he offers many different styles of designer American jeans. I also ride my bike often around the city and to neighboring villages and biking has probably become one of my favorite past times. I live in the central region of the country so it's very green and only moderately hilly. I'm definitely going to invest in a bike when I get back to the states.

Though I haven't started working much yet, I spend quite a bit of time travelling around with my homologue and meeting with various "important" individuals. My homologue works for the Red Cross so he's been able to introduce me to a bunch of Togolese people that I can potentially do work with in the future. Last week I met an official who works for a "Prevention of Child Trafficking" NGO in my city and I am very much looking forward to doing projects with him. I'm taking advantage of this period in my life to read as many books as I can get my hands on. I just finished The Hunger Games series and I've just finished the first book in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo series. So far I really like it, and I'm open to suggestions for new books!!

I miss all of you very much and just know that I think about my friends and family at home all the time. I know I have their love and support and I think that above all, that is the most important thing to me.

Love love.

Playing In The Sun.

Greetings everyone!! Sorry for the lack of posts, the internet can be hard to come by at times.  In case you're busy at the moment (or perhaps you experience massive digestive issues the minute you sit in front of a computer like me) I'll give you a few quick updates followed by a longer version if you care to read along.

Tomorrow marks my first full week at post. I am in a large city in the central region of Togo called Sokode. It's the second largest city in the country and it is predominately Muslim. So far I really like it a lot, the people are really nice and I can see many possible avenues for me to do work. I have what may be the largest house of any volunteer in the country, but it's not without its drawbacks. The lack of a neighborhood Ikea and Home Depot makes home repair and furnishing quite difficult. I ordered a few pieces of furniture already, but they won't be ready for a few more weeks. Until then, the cat and I (Oh, did I mention I adopted a cat? Yes, her name is Eunice and I won her in a dance contest – naturally. Okay, that's a bit of a stretch, it wasn't as much of a dance contest as it was a silent auction, but there was dancing happening during it, thus, dance contest.)  are sitting on the ground and sleeping on a mattress. It's not all that bad, I'm one of the lucky volunteers with electricity and running water. I also have a really awesome bike which I LOVE riding around. Seriously, biking is so much more fun than walking or driving; I don't know why I didn't do it more in the states. Anyway, I digress. This week I've been hanging out with the other two volunteers that are posted in Sokode with me. Katy is a Girl's Education volunteer and she's finishing up her two years at post but she is an AMAZING person who just happens to also be a UT alum (I'm not saying the two are mutually exclusive, but I mean come on, most people who go to UT are awesome – fact of life.) and we've been working on her World Map project at the school she built in Sokode. Oh yeah, the girl built a school, no big deal. Ha ha, but really, this girl is awesome in every sense of the word and I feel so lucky for having gotten to know her. For dinner tonight we made an awesome 'hash a la The Kerby Scramble or 24 Diner 'hash. I definitely miss American breakfast the most, maybe even more than my own brother (just kidding Rumin, kinda…) but luckily it's easy to replicate. If you want to send things my way, breakfast items would be nice. :D

So that pretty much sums up life at post, a lot of sitting around thinking "What the f**k am I doing here, what was I thinking, how can I live here for two years, etc." Somehow, amidst all those thoughts, I manage to thinking of all my loved ones back and home and all the people that I care about so much and look up to and somehow it all seems okay.  I feel incredibly lucky to be here and I am hopeful that the next 23 months will be productive and illuminating. The best thing about this experience so far though, (and again, it's food related, sorry…) is this thing called FanYogo. It's like fro-yo in a bag and it's heaven…especially on a blazing hot African afternoon where you've sweat through every article of clothing including your shoelaces. Other things I like about Togo: Getting called "Yovo/Anasara" by African kids while riding on my bike and then slamming on the breaks in front of them and watching them scatter in terror/laughter; having more time to read books than I've ever had in my entire life (again, I'm open to recommendations.); riding my bike around through the jungle and having numerous "I can't believe I'm in Africa" moments. I think about all my family and friends constantly though, and a phone call from anyone, no matter how long, is a welcome escape into a world that seems oddly distant now. I'm not sure what I miss the most about home (other than breakfast) but if I had to make a list I think my friends and family would occupy the top slots. Also, as I mentioned before, I miss Ikea…like a lot. You don't really realize how hard it is to furnish a home until the idea of a furniture store or Target no longer exists. Lessons are being learned my friends…

In other news, I was officially sworn in as a Peace Corps Volunteer last week in a wonderful ceremony that was broadcast on Togolese television. Coming to post and being stopped by people on the road was a very surreal experience, I'm sure that's what it must be like for vrai celebrities. All the volunteers gave a speech in a local language (written for us by our language instructors of course) and at the end we had what was quite possibly the most fun party I've ever attended. I don't remember the last time I danced for so long without stopping. I also performed the Single Ladies dance by Beyonce (I know my mother must be so proud of all the things I'm doing to change the world – one choreographed dance at a time.) and there is now photographic evidence of it on facebook…some things never change I guess. The 9 weeks of training flew by, and now that I think of it, I can't really believe that I've been here for almost 11 weeks. In those 9 weeks of training, I achieved numerous things:  thanks to the plethora of vaccinations, I'm quite confident I've achieved immunity to everything possible short of biological warfare. I can now confidently converse in French – It's not perfect, but seeing as I started learning in January, I'd say I'm doing pretty well. I am also trained in a variety of community health topics as well as how to be an effective development worker. For the first three months at post, I'm to learn about my community and their needs in order to better serve them. In the meantime, I'm also learning how to navigate Togolese culture, one awkward encounter at a time. In all honesty, the people here are so nice and friendly, it's rather refreshing and humbling to see people with so little willing to give so much. I think if anything, that is one thing I will take away from this experience already – no matter how much you have or think you need in life, the most any of us could ever hope for is the ability to give to another (that's my opinion at least, as ineloquently as I stated it.)

I miss you all and love you very much!! Thanks CG, CP, and AP for sending me letters, your responses are on the way I promise!! Check out the tab on the left for my new mailing address!!

Love love.

P.S. – Being cut off from current events is extremely hard. Newspaper clippings and magazines would be great things to send me and the relative low cost is easily outweighed by the abundance of information, at least in my opinion. Any major advances in technology, culture, and politics are my topics of highest interest.

 

Good Vibrations.

And so it goes, day twenty-something in Togo. I'm already loosing
track. Things have just been going so well, I'm happy to report, and I
have quite thoroughly enjoyed my time here in AFRICA!! Sometimes, as
I'm sure you all wonder, I forget that I'm actually here and it isn't
until I find myself staring at some giant tree or an amazing sunset
that I remember, "F**k, I'm in Africa." Yeah, I would say that happens
probably once a week, but it's getting better.

I'm currently in week 4 of 9 of my home stay/training. This is the
time in which we are trained on not only how to do our jobs but also
how to communicate. As a culmination of 3 weeks of intensive language
instruction, we gave our first presentations today, in French, in
front of all of our trainers and other supervisors. I was a bit
nervous, never having done a presentation in French let alone in
another country, but I am thrilled at how well it went. I made a point
to mention during my presentation that I have only been studying
French since January, because I am very proud of my progress up to
this point. Other than languages, we have also had some fantastic
sessions about different topics such as weighing babies and
facilitating discussion workshops on a wide range of topics, including
but not limited to: "How to put on a condom," "Working with people
living with AIDS," and my personal favorite "Enriched Porridge, a How
to Guide." Mind you, this is all in French, but as I said before, it's
progressing!! So far everything has felt relatively familiar to me;
it's almost like an extended RA training, which is something that I
grew to really enjoy as many of you might already know. As for the
last 5 weeks of training, one will be spent visiting our posts for the
next two years and the rest will be spent largely in the same manner
as described previously. I'm VERY excited.

Speaking of my post, I should probably mention that I've been given a
FANTASTIC post in the central region of Togo in a large city called
Sokode. My work will be primarily with different NGOs like the World
Health Organization and the Red Cross. It is honestly a better
assignment than I could have ever dreamed for, and also (because I'm
sure you all are dying to know) I will probably have electricity AND –
wait for it – running water. I know, crazy talk. It's like I'm not
even in Africa, but I can assure you, I am. So far no scary encounters
with spiders or other creepy crawlies, however, ask anyone in my stage
and I'm sure they'd be the first to tell you that I have no problem
touching bugs…(I'm always somehow being caught chasing butterflies and
other winged-beasts.)

Another thing that I want to mention before I finish up this blog post
is how much I've been able to read!! In these past few weeks I've read
close to 5 books!! AND, one of my best friends is going to send me an
eReader filled with more intellectual goodies I'm sure!! I'm so
incredibly happy – I had forgotten how much I enjoyed reading for
pleasure. For a running list of books I've read, please click on the
tab on the left labeled "Reading List."

All in all, I'm immensely happy to be here – more than I ever really
imagined honestly. I miss everyone SOOOO much, you have no idea. I
also never imagined how GREAT it would be to talk to a friend on the
phone. It's fantastic, so please please please figure out how to call
me and do it – I'd love to catch up. Even better, write a letter (hey
that rhymes!). It costs about a dollar to send and I promise I will
write back...eventually. As far as things I "need," I can honestly say
that I have everything I need and then some.
(Except maybe some oreos, those would be nice…)

Love love love.

P.S. – In case you were wondering, I don't have access to regular
internet just yet, my apologies. One of our wonderful trainers is
allowing us to use her internet key. I might look into investing in
one as soon as I look into investing in a computer. Baby steps y'all.
As for now, it's safe to assume that I won't have internet access
again until August at the earliest.

Home in Lome.

Greetings tout le monde!

I am posting this blog from the Peace Corps headquarters in Lome, Togo. As you may have already read by now, I am officially in Togo as a PST (Peace Corps Trainee)!! Let me just start by saying that I miss you very much, but also that you shouldn't worry too much because I am in very good hands. We are being treated so well here, I am honestly very impressed. Today was the last day of our "pre-pre-service training," and it has been quite fun. It's basically like an RA training session, just in Africa - so I'm pretty cool with it. We learned a lot about how to shit today (Staying Healthy In Togo), literally and figuratively, and we have also been working on getting to know each other better. The two programs in my "Stage" (pronounced: Stah-juh) are the Community Health and AIDS prevention team and the Small Enterprise Development team. Everyone is really great and I feel really lucky to be working with such great people.

A lot of the older PCVs are SUPER cool as well. I totally feel like I've found my "people," which is honestly something I was worried about before coming here. The kinds of people that join the Peace Corps are obviously very diverse, but the common threads are almost always there. Progressive-minded, accepting, and FUN! At our welcome party, someone was playing the new GAGA CD (Shibe, Government Hooker, and Heavy Metal Lover are my favorite) and someone even busted out glow bands at some point - it was awesome.

Tomorrow we are moving in with our host families and I'm very excited to meet them!! I probably won't be able to update my blog for a while while I'm gone, but you can definitely send me packages!! I'll also be getting a phone so that you can call me. I was supposed to get it today, but the guy who was going to sell them to us never showed up (pretty normal practice I assume.) It'll be okay though, I'll get one soon enough and as soon as I figure out a way to send the number out, I will have my PR rep post it. :) *wink*

Love you all beaucoup!! Wish me luck!!

AF 8538 to Togo now boarding...

"Dance the night away, Live your life and stay out on the floor..." as J.Lo would say it. I'm about to leave Philadelphia and for the next 24 hours I will be travelling to Africa (Togo, specifically) to live this crazy adventure known as the Peace Corps. The last few hours in the states have been interesting. Saying goodbye to my loved ones at the airports has been one of the hardest things I think I've ever done, but I'm still alive so I'll take that as a sign that everything is going to be okay. All day yesterday I saw little signs/reminders of home and my loved ones; it was as if someone had lit a pathway for me and I was just along for the ride. (HP reference: It's like a had a bit of Felix Felicius and I was following an illuminated pathway, it was cool.) I just keep hearing this little voice in my head that says "Just put one foot in front of another, it'll be okay." Hopefully that same voice doesn't start telling me to kill myself once I'm on the malaria prophylaxis medication...

Everyone here is AWESOME!! Our group is small, 23 people or so, and so far we've just been getting to know each other. This is the first time EVER where I've been the only person from Texas. It's kidna weird and refreshing and I'm strangely proud of being from such a cool state. The rest of the people in my group going to Togo, also known as Peace Corps Trainees (PCTs), are from all over and everyone has a different/interesting background and story. I'm very much looking forward to this exprience with all of them. Yesterday was a very trying day because on top of being an emotional rollercoaster, I was exhausted. I would feel random waves of sadness throughout the day, and by the end of it all I just wanted to sleep. I'm feeling a lot better today and I'm very much looking forward to the flight to Africa!! Anyone who knows me knows how much I like being in airports, and I'm about to visit two really cool ones (CDG/JFK). I'll try and post something soon after I reach post, but I probably won't be within calling range for a week or so.

Anyways, I feel like I'm blabbing on a bit, so I'll end it here. I love you all very much and I feel safe carrying so many stories, relationships, and love with me to Togo. It's the lighest thing I'm packing, but I also feel like it's going to be the most important. (Except my roommate in Philly had this really cool UV water filter, I'm not gonna lie I was kinda jealous...)

Wish me luck with trying to get all my carry-on luggage on to the plane! I've been practing how to say "Please sir, I really need both of these bags because I'm going to Africa!!" in french. :-)

In-and-Out

Contrary to the title of this post, I am not going to write about the delicious burgers and In-and-Out. (Okay, but just for the record, I had a double-double animal style with fries and a napoleon milkshake. It was so good!) I am currently sitting at my dining room table surrounded by friends and family, which was the theme for the past week of my life. It is great, I am going to miss everyone so much, I just know it. I also feel very/extremely/"enough to the circle the galaxy twice" loved...I am a very lucky boy.

This process has been long, and stressful, and I've had more than a few meltdowns. I don't think that it all would have been possible without my friends and family. I won't name any names, but you all know who you are. Anyone who knows me will say that I love with all my heart, and it's true, I love to love. As cliché as it sounds, I feel like exist to spread love in the world. That is my goal and mantra for this adventure in Africa. To quote one of my biggest heros, "“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to turn on the light.” I am the light, I am love. I will never be without it and I will carry it with me wherever I go.

In-and-out we go, through the different chapters of life, sometimes flipping back to re-read the very best parts, but always looking forward to what comes next. I love you all. Wish me luck!!

The letter M.

I love the letter M, many great words start with it. Off the top of my head I can think of three: Mommy, Macroons, and a certain friend whose name starts with the letter M. All great things - all things that I will miss dearly when I go to Africa in EXACTLY 1 WEEK (well, technically 6 days, 23 hours, and 13 minutes until the entire adventure beings, but who's counting!?)

Today started with an early morning dental appointment, the last for the next two years. Ironically, at the end of the appointment they asked me if I wanted to schedule my next visit (they're usually 6 months apart.) I was a bit surprised because I had spend the last half hour struggling through a mouth full of tools to explain to the hygienist where I was going and what I would be doing with the Peace Corps for the next two years. With complete nonchalance she clicked through the calendar to August 2013 (the month I return from the PC) and said "which days works best for you?" Is it weird that having a dental appointment scheduled for when I return makes me feel a bit better about going? It all goes back to the idea that "two years is not forever and I will be back...eventually."

So far, packing is going better than expected. If it hadn't been for my friend whose name starts with the letter M I probably would have had more melt-downs than I did. It seems that I've forgotten how to shop for myself properly because I was completely overwhelmed at each store I went to. Most people who know me will say that I'm relatively calm and collected, even under pressure - well, not today my friend, not today. In between trying to find suitable luggage and stocking up on pepto-bismol, I realized that in order to maintain sanity throughout this process, I just have to focus on all the things I'm taking with me that don't fit into my luggage. I know that I'm a quick learner and highly adaptable (or so I'd like to think) and that I can be very resourceful if need be. I'm hoping these attributes make up for the fact that I plan on trying to stuff as much underwear as I can into my luggage. We all have our vices, mine is underwear.

Without the support of all my amazing friend and family I would definitely not be where I am today. I am who I am because of them and I will miss them every day that I am gone. I'm doing this to not only enrich my life, but hopefully enrich theirs. Another great lady, Marsha* Gay Hardin (*also with an M) spoke at commencement last year and while I don't remember most of her speech, I do remember her saying: "Go forth and find your joy." I plan on doing just that. Wish me luck y'all!

Prologues and Epiloges

At this point in my life, I feel like I am very much in an "inbetween." Having just graduated a few days ago, I am now at home preparing for the next book in my life known as "From Texas to Togo, An adventure with the Peace Corps." I'm not exactly sure how it's going to go, but I am hopeful that I will at least survive the experience and maybe even learn a thing or two.

I'm trying really hard not to get stressed out by packing lists and going away parties and making sure all my affairs are in order. I know that I have the support of all of my friends and family (well, most of them...some of my extended family in Iran seem to think I'm literally insane for leaving an American life to live in Africa) and that makes me feel 100 times better. My current worries are whether or not I will be able to limit myself to packing only 80lbs and also if I actually know any french (because I feel like I know nothing...absolutely nothing.)

I am looking forward to a lot of things though, mostly traveling to Africa and meeting all of the other PCVs that will be working with me for the next two years. I wonder if everybody else is feeling the same things I am right now, and I'm guessing most are. If I had to describe it, it's a mixture of nervous anticipation, excitement, nausea, and a bit of hopefulness. I'm hopeful that as one good experience ends, another will begin. I left Austin yesterday, leaving behind many memories and friends. I had some of my best friends with me towards the end of it all, so the transition was a bit smoother, but it was still hard to leave such an amazing city. I honestly don't think that I would have even applied to the Peace Corps had I not lived in Austin and gone to UT. Aside from all of the courses and labs, and as clichéd as this sounds, I really did learn A LOT about myself as an individual. Austin and UT allowed me to be myself without having to censor any part of me and through all the experiences I had I think that I have a much stronger sense of who I am. Going into my next experience, I can only imagine how important a strong sense of "self" will be, and in my opinion, it is the most valuable thing I am taking with me. I may not know a lot about Public Health or the french language, but what I do know is that I am an optimistic and bright individual who is capable of giving and loving and many other wonderful things.

For anyone reading this blog (and I hope some people are) I will do my best to post entries about my life and feelings while abroad as often as possible. I can't make any guarantees, and I will admit that I have an awful track record with writing blogs, but I think that once life starts happening, I will have more to say. I think the reason I have failed to write about my life in the past is that I didn't view many of my experiences as "things to chronicle to remember forever" but rather "experiences that help shape my own identity," and admittedly, the meaning of the latter is much harder to put into words.

Here goes nothing!!

Love,
ARO

I am a lucky boy.

Warning: Contains explicit language.

Instead of studying for my last Cell Biology midterm (which I need to pass in order to graduate, ironically) I'm struck with the fact that in exactly 5 weeks I will be in Africa. Needless to say I've been distracted by the internet, reading blog after blog after packing list from all of the prospective PCVs leaving this summer. Some people have already packed and some are already writing beautifully eloquent blog posts about their feelings and expectations for this experience. So far, I have packed absolutely nothing and I'm having serious doubts about my abilities to even express myself coherently under pressure. "Why do you think this Ryan, you must have been able to do something right or else you wouldn't have been selected to join the PC!?" It was a fluke, trust me! I'm going to arrive in Africa and everyone will realize that I barely speak french and that I'm sorely incapable of living with spiders and snakes and that all I really good at is making origami cranes.

Yesterday, I was speaking with a dear friend about what it would be like if we could record every conscious thought and so this is my attempt at that experiment starting with the thought "30 days to go (ha ha, to go - Togo, get it. Shit, I haven't even started yet...)

Well, I wonder what it will be like to finally get to philly and meet all the other PCVs going to Togo. I'm sure they're all probably thinking the same thing I am which is "holy fucking hell, I'm going to be living in Africa, wtf." That is a comforting thought. You know what else is comforting, peanut butter, I need to make sure I buy a lot before I go. Gosh, there is so much that I have to do before I leave, I can't even start thinking about it. What if I just show up in Philadeliphia with nothing but a backpack, I wonder what the other people would think of me they'd probably just laugh and say how screwed I was (in french) and then I would probably barf in their face and realize that I'm going to be living in fucking africa where there are snakes and spiders and HOLY SHIT I'M GOING TO AFRICA, what am I doing, why am I agreeing to this!!?? I can barely speak french beyond describing what kind of movie I like to watch. people die in africa, I can't die before I visit new york and there is so much I want to eat before I die, how sad is it that all I want to do is eat, it is my comfort!

So yes, to sum it all up in all of it's ungrammatical glory, I am a melodramatic fatty who is afraid of spiders and apparently also afraid of packing. Well, we'll see what happens.

At the end of the day, I try and focus on a few simple thoughts:

- Two years is not forever. And if you die at least you'll have lived.
- There are SO many people who love you and know that you will succeed. You can rely on them and they will always be there for you even if you fail at this.
- Wanting to come back home won't be considered failure, not giving this experience a chance though, would be.
- You're bright, and capable, and SMART, and you have what it takes even if you don't know where punctuation goes some of the time! (Repeat x3 daily.)

Cross your fingers for me y'all.

Love,
ARO

Dreams and Aspirations.

Every morning, even before I open my eyes, I am thinking about what the next 27 months of my life are going to look like in Africa. Some of you may know (and by some I mean no one because I have yet to publicize this blog's existence...) that I have accepted an invitation to join the Peace Corps as a Community/Public Health Advisor in Togo. My date of departure is rapidly approaching and the next month before I leave will probably be the most hectic month of my life. Today, I realized that in less than two weeks after I walk across the stage at graduation, I will be flying across the world to a new life in Africa. (That' is CRAZY!!)

Amidst all of my final midterms and exams and everything else I need to do school-wise before I leave, I literally think about the Peace Corps ALL THE DAMN TIME! Not an hour goes by in which I don't think about what my life will be like, who I will meet, what I will eat - yes, all of these questions cycle in an endless loop. I think what I'm looking forward to the most right now is meeting people that are going to be with me during training. Some of you all may know, I find "training events" to be highly enjoyable, and from what I gather from other peoples' blogs, the PC training is 10 weeks of FUN covering a multitude of topics ranging from "how to poo in a latrine" to filtering water and speaking french. (Luckily I have the latrine thing down. Thank you family vacations to Iran!)

All of my dreams are slowly becoming about the Peace Corps as well. I can only imagine what will happen when I'm on the malaria prophylaxis - which some say induces vivid dreams. That's a silver lining in my opinion.